Feb 22, 2010

You Just Never Know


Me at the Tickled Pink Women's Event


"I am not a leader, just so you know." "I do not talk in front of people". "I could never be on a stage and speak". "I never lose weight, ever!" "I write only for myself." These are the lies I believed for years and Satan did everything in his power to convince me of such things. If he didn't use others to make me feel this way, he would use the insecurities that ran rampant through my silly brain.

Can we get real for a moment? I am just like you. I am after all, a pink carnation. Do you know what that means? If not, go read this now. Okay, now you know who I am, but guess what? God knows me too, and He thinks that I am more than just a pink carnation. It isn't that I'm not happy being that fill in person, a friend to many, and a good wife and mom. It is that God has taken me on a journey where He said, "Susie, we are going to bloom a little more now, so get ready. You can still be the you that I created you to be, but let's not just stop there. I gave you a heart for women that need to be connected, I gave you a new church full of women that needed to get connected, and I gave you a super supportive pastor and his wife to allow you to make a difference." All I can say is, "Wow!" Every lie I have been believing for the last 5 years or more was proven false over the last couple of months. I promise you that I am not taking the credit here. God did it all, orchestrated it all, and blessed it all!

This weekend I spoke in front of over a hundred women at our church(on a microphone), and on stage. I didn't faint, trip, or throw up. I wasn't perfect, and I sure wasn't a professional, but I did it. I get teary eyed as I think back to finishing up and seeing one of my best friends, Tiffany who was visiting from Florida. She came up and surprised me afterward. She told me I did great, and I just about started bawling. See God not only gives us his strength to help us do things we think we never could, he also gives us friends who believe in us and encourage us along the way. I don't know where I'd be without my supportive friends. There are too many to count, but I really want to especially thank Tiffany, Liana, Kristan, my sis Debbie and my mother-in-law Linda for their constant belief that I really can do more than I think. I want you to know I'm not trying to make this a bigger deal than it really was, but for me, it was something I never dreamed could happen.

Now going back to the lies I mentioned above, I am still working on those last two. Just to fill you in, I have officially lost 10lbs. since January. Slowly, but surely, my body is changing into a more fit and healthy one. Thank you to my new friend Monica, the best Zumba Instructor in Corpus Christi. Thank you also to all the friends who encourage me with the changes they see and inspire me to look as good as they do(ha ha). This last lie is a toughie. I love to write, but I have been doing so much that I have put off indulging in the time it takes to sit down and write well. I think this one will come in time, but I know it will have to be God's time like everything else that has transpired up until this point. Isn't God amazing how he has shown himself so faithful, and He will do the same for you, probably even more! Trust Him to shatter those lies from the enemy and be all He wants you to be. Go for it friends, and I can't wait to see what God does with each of you!

"God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us." Ephesians 3:20 (The message)





Me, Monica and Amanda (The Zumba Life Group leaders)

12 comments:

Robin said...

I am crazy proud of you! This post made me smile and get all teary eyed at the same time. HUgs and Love from OKC....

Susie said...

Thank you Robin:) You have been such an encouraging friend too, hopefully one day I'll thank you in person!

Susan said...

This thrilled my heart, Susie!!!! ALL God ever wants is a willing vessel and when we will be that He comes and does the rest and blows our mind in the doing.

Amanda said...

You did awesome! Tickled Pink was so incredible for me. I knew I was supposed to be helping women connect but I wasn't sure how well that would work when I still felt so not connected myself. But an amazing thing happened when we went into the worship center-I had a whole row of my girls there. And it wasn't about me but i realized that they were connecting to each other and to RLF through me!

Julie Gillies said...

I am SO proud of you, Susie! You have a heart of gold and God has given you a desire to reach out and touch others--along with gifts to help you do just that. Thank you for keeping it real.

You go, girl!

Susie said...

Thank you so much girls!

Amanda, what you said warms my heart so much! Thank you for being so faithful to your calling, and thank you for loving and encouraging the girls God has given you to lead! You are awesome! I never felt connected anywhere either until I started serving and leading bible studies for others 6 years ago. Amazing what God has done for so many of us!

Danielle said...

Susie, when you post about things like this it just doesn't connect for me with the woman I am getting to know. I think you are a fabulous leader, so full of grace and confidence. You are hilarious and a fantastic public speaker.

I don't know who you used to be, but the person I see in front of me now a true natural.

Susie said...

Danielle, you are so kind to say that. I was that girl, but there is definitely a confidence when God has come through over and over for you. I think most of all I got over trying to please others and made it my goal to instead please God! Hey, where have I heard that before?

Tanya said...

I'm sorry I missed Tickled Pink. I heard it was awesome. I hope to get to know you even better, as I think you and Skip are both giant blessings to RLF!

Grace!

Faith Imagined said...

You have the perfect spirit for a leader -- humble and real! You go, girl, with your super CA-UTE t-shirts!

Susie said...

Thank you Tanya and Alisa! You both make my heart smile!!!

Bonnelle said...

So... I met you a couple of years ago at a She Speaks conference in North Carolina. As the Lord told me to dig out the cards I received that weekend, the first one I saw was your pink carnation card. Reading this post inspires me because God has been talking to me lately about my own fears.

Thank you for blessing my life then but for blessing me with your boldness as you spoke in front of all those women.

Awesome job of letting the Light of Jesus shine through you!

Walking in His Love and grace,
Bonnelle