Patience - Can't We Skip This One Fruit of the Spirit

I am in the middle of my 11 week study "Living Beyond Yourself, Exploring the Fruit of the Spirit" by Beth Moore. I have absolutely loved this study more than any other study I've ever done, and yes, I always say this about every new Beth Moore study I take on. It is because every new study I do is miraculously the exact thing I need to work on in my spiritual life at every given time I've started a new one. Isn't that awesome how God works that out?

Well, as much as I've loved this study, I don't like this week. There is a road barrier of sorts that has come up. I am trying to push on through, but it is difficult. This week's study is making me cry uncontrollably, get angry with myself, and bringing up so many things I have pushed down for the last 2 and a half years. Let's just say, "I'm not enjoying it one bit." This week is on patience. Okay, I can handle patience. I had to endure my son's illness when he was born, I had a house on the market for over a year, and I have three children-need I say more. However, during day 3 Beth turned this whole subject of patience in a direction I wasn't ready to go. She started teaching on judgment of others. Okay, yes I know this is a toughie. "I can soak this in and learn something new," I told myself. Then she suddenly took another turn on day 4 and started bringing "forgiveness" into the mix. Wait a second, how can we go from patience to forgiveness. I wasn't anticipating having to work on that particular area. It wasn't in the syllabus. I started reading quotes like, "If we neglect the necessity of forgiveness, we fail to complete the portrait of biblical patience. Then I read, "Patience is the vessel through which God pours His mercy. Mercy is fueled by biblical patience."

Normally I can say without a doubt that I have forgiven every wrong done to me, either intentionally or non-intentional. However, as I'm reading the following verse, I realize, I am still holding on to something I need to let go of- and quick.

Mark 11:25 "And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

Wait a minute God, I thought I laid that "thing" down at your feet a long time ago, but just this morning when I encountered a thought about that "thing" I immediately let a negative thought come into my mind. Well, I guess I'm not quite done with it after all. Sometimes, forgiveness can be taken care of immediately with a prayer. Mine hasn't obviously. Beth went on to say that the Greek word most often used for forgive is aphiemi, which means "to let go from one's power, possession, to let go free, let escape." I don't even know if it is so much that I don't forgive a person or thing, but instead the fact that I know that others still hold something against me and my family. That is tough. I don't know if they would even read this blog, or if they even have thoughts about us anymore. I want them to understand why we did what we did at the time, but most of all it comes down to I want their forgiveness for us.

There is a patience that can only come from God and it is called "makrothumia" in the Greek form. This is the "patience" towards others that results from being filled with the Holy Spirit. I want this patience in my life, so that I may forgive freely, that I may not judge others, so I can give mercy as needed, and so that I can live life with a clean slate. Maybe you are fortunate and harbor no un-forgiveness in your life, but if you are like me, you need to stop whatever you think needs to be done right now, and get on your knees. Ask for God to let forgiveness rule over personal feelings. It doesn't mean that the hurt didn't happen, it doesn't mean wrong was not done to you, but it does mean that when you stand before God one day, you will be forgiven as you have forgiven others. That is my choice today, and I hope you let it be yours.

"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." Col. 3:12-13

Don't Get Burned

When I was a little girl learning to cook, I would often get careless and burn myself. I might have touched a hot pan, or stood to close to the oven door, and there you have it, I had burned myself. My mom would use this opportunity to say, "See how much that hurts? That is just a tiny taste of what it will feel like if you don't be a good girl and you go down to the devil." Okay guys, I know that is a horrible thing to say to a child, and completely un-biblical, but she did her very best as a mother. I love her more than anything for the loving parent she was despite the funny things she would say to get me to straighten up. However, this little girl grew up to believe that being a good girl was what God wanted, and would be the catalyst to get me to heaven. I asked Christ in my heart at a young age, but never really understood that it was all about a personal relationship with Christ until many years later.

At 19, I realized that I was in need of a personal savior and that it didn't matter how good I tried to be, I would never be good enough to get into heaven. I confessed I was a sinner to God, I acknowledged that Jesus died on the cross for my sins and rose again, and believed that I would one day live in Heaven with Christ forever. At this time, even though I had began a relationship with Christ, I still lived as a person who had not really changed. Then 5 more years passed, I was married and FINALLY a light bulb went off. I knew I was going to heaven all along, but now I wanted to really know God and to have the relationship I knew He had waiting for me all along. I started studying the bible, and really reading it. It was so hard to understand and often a bit boring. Everyone around me seem to get it, but I struggled big time. I had excellent teachers and mentors who led me through the next 10 years, sharing all they knew and encouraging me along the way. I absolutely fell in love with the Word of God-I cannot get enough of it now. I have to constantly be in a study of some sort. I crave it like nothing I've ever craved before. God has allowed me to also see countless lives changed through his goodness and love during this unbelievable christian walk of mine.

Tonight as I was pulling the lasagna out of the oven, I burned myself pretty bad. My girls were both in the kitchen with me and wanted to see what the loud, "OW!" was all about. I showed them my red arm, and I actually started to smile remembering my mother's words. See my smile comes from the fact that both my girls don't hear words like I did. They both know Christ and they are having the relationship that it took me 25 years to start. I don't know why, but this experience tonight brought back to memory that scared little girl that I used to be. The little girl who didn't know if she was going to heaven when she died. She knew she had done some things that God wouldn't like, and it was always a thought for her that she might not be good enough. It also made me wonder how many of my friends reading this often feel like that scared little girl. Am I good enough to go to heaven? Friends, I once knew that feeling too, and it is not a good way to live.

You can be assured right now of your salvation forever and ever. Do what I did and turn your life over to Christ. Find a church where you can grow and fellowship with others. Don't wait and let time slip by as I did. I promise you Jesus is more thrilling and amazing than anything this world has to offer, and your life will be forever changed. God created you, he loves you, and he is anxiously waiting for you to come to Him. I'm praying for you!

Romans 10:9-10 "If you confess with your mouth, 'Jesus is Lord,' and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved."

John 3:16 says: "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life."

Joy, Joy, Joy, Sickness, Joy, Joy, Joy

This last week's study for "Living Beyond Yourself" was all about the fruit of the Spirit-JOY. Tuesday and Wednesday were literally overflowing days of joy due to an unbelievable extended time of studying God's Word. I had been asking God so many questions and finally surrendered them at his feet. He not only gave me answers I was looking for, he gave me specifics of how to go about doing the things I had been praying about starting.

One bit of joyful news is that I will be starting a Women's Ministry at our church. We already have such great women leading Life Groups and serving in so many areas, but we haven't had a coordinator bringing them all together with focus and vision. God laid it on my heart to start this for our women. If you have been reading my blog long, and know the title story, you will say, "What?" Susie, you aren't a leader, remember? You are the one filling in for, helping, assisting, doing what is needed." Well, that is what I've always held on to and believed. However, I am a child of the Most High, and when he clearly laid it on my heart to lead this, I know he will completely equip me and strengthen me to carry on His plans. Once I said, "Yes God", he started pouring forth ideas and plans in my head. My pastor and his wife are fulling supporting me, and are excited also. I also found a talented graphics artist and blog designer to get us started with getting the word out to our women. Hopefully, later this week, I will unveil the Real Life Fellowship's Women's blog. I am so pumped to see how women will get involved not only in the new bible studies we are already doing, but in the community outreach projects, the service in our own church and the different social events and groups that will be starting in the future. Just in my own Life Group of 15 ladies, there are so many talented and potential leaders who each have amazing testimonies of life change and how God is working in their lives. I am blessed, humbled and not to mention amazed at what is to come.

Right after so many great things happening this week, Annie (my 9 yr old) came down with the flu. It hit her hard and kept us home-ridden for the last 4 days. She is on Tamiflu, but is feeling a lot better. We have her fever under control, and she is mostly just non-stop coughing. I know she will fully recover in the next day or two. We caught it very early. On a side note, I am making an appointment with my gynecologist this week. I have something that is hurting in one of my upper portion areas(okay, one of my boobs) and I want to get it checked quick. I can't feel anything like a knot or lump, but it is sore to sleep on and if I accidentally brush against something, there is pain. I am not worried at all, but I am going to get checked, just as I do each year. Keep that in your prayers if you could, and that the rest of my family would stay flu-free.

Joy is something I have come to look at so differently lately. My homework was a full 5 days worth of learning about how much we need joy and how much as believers we need to live out joy. One of the most important things that hit me was God is the true Possessor and Giver of true joy. Beth Moore says, "Fleeting moments of happiness may be experienced through other channels, but inner joy flows only from Christ." I could not agree more. The one thing she reminded me of that I constantly want to remember to never take for granted is that my greatest joy needs to be in knowing that my name is written in heaven. Now that, is definitely reason to be joyful.

Thought It Might Be Time for Another House Post

We have been back in our old house for the last six months, and through this time we have come to realize that as much as God has provided, this house just isn't going to work. We gave it our best shot, and have been able to keep afloat, but just barely. There are no extras in life, and it is getting to a point that we have to make a pretty big decision. We have been blessed with a job Skip loves and schools that we don't want to compromise by changing, and both of us feel the house is a way to make a big dent in our finances. Since we have already lived in two much smaller homes over the last two years, we have no problem with down sizing whatsoever. In fact, we can't even fill up the house we live in now, because there isn't extra money to do so. We had given away and sold many items thinking we were going to be in Victoria forever, and never bought new things when we moved back home to Corpus.

I have been busy today rearranging some chairs and furniture while planning to put our house back on the market. We haven't decided exactly what route we are going to take, such as putting it for sale by owner, or working out something with a builder friend of ours. I just wanted to let you all know that I would appreciate prayers as we continue to rely on God's direction for what we should do. I can honestly say that I learned over the last couple of years that a house truly does not make a home. A home is made by love and the people living together in it. My desire is to seek God's approval for our future, and I am believing He will make known to us what is best and right.

I am so thankful that God's love and provision for me has proven faithful more times than I can count. There is always going to be uncertainty in life, but His love is always a constant .

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

Having One of Those Days, The Good Kind

I started my day with God. Turned off the distractions (in my case Facebook, radio, tv and phone) and got down to some serious QUIET time. It was the second time this week I was able to have an extended time of study. Thirty minutes into it today, I felt what I had been longing for...a REAL word from God. Who knows how we get these blessed moments out of the blue. It has been way too long since I've had one, but when I do, there is no mistaking them. I've been in God's word consistently for many years, but it is often rushed, thrown together, and half hearted a lot of the time.

Today was similar to many other days, only I really let God direct every step of my studying. If I felt I needed to stop and praise, I did. If I felt I needed to stop and confess, I did. If I felt I needed to stop and encourage someone, I did. Have you every done this? I rarely take the time, but oh was it worth it! God literally started revealing things to me that I have been praying about, and He had specific instructions for me to begin working on. It totally freaks me out a bit, but I am confident that it was guided by the Holy Spirit from start to finish. I am so excited, not so much for the outcome of all the things that God is going to accomplish and let me be a part of, but that His love for me was so REAL and apparent today. Hey, and guess what? He loves you just as much as me, and wants you to have this same special relationship with Him. So what are you waiting for? Seek Him and spend time with Him today.

Top 10 Things Keeping Me Away From This Blog

1. FAMILY I think that as my kids get older, we spend even more quality time together than we did when they were little. They are such fun kids! They actually want to hang out with me and Skip on the weekends and to go places with us. Hope this continues.

2. FACEBOOK Do I even need to explain to you friends? Probably should have been number one. It is my dream social networking tool. I love to connect to people, to encourage, to share what God is doing in the lives of my family and those I love. Facebook lets me do it all, and then some. Trying to stay away from anything that ends in "Ville", but it still keeps me pretty busy just the same. How fun is talking to your sweet friends from high school and to see that you all finally got back on track with God. Love it.

3. Bible Study Beth Moore's Living Beyond Yourself takes time. Time I LOVE, but time away from writing nonetheless. This study is one I wasn't sure about doing because it is old, and I felt it probably wouldn't challenge me as much as others I had done. Boy was I wrong. I am on a new high from all the knowledge God is pouring into these hours of study. Will I ever feel like I'm on my way, I sure hope not. And don't even get me started on my precious new bible study friends. I am humbled, completely humbled by their sweetness.

4. Hubby If I do anything right in this life, I want it to be being an awesome wife to Skip. I feel like God helps me do this because I truly seek His wisdom every day on being Skip's helpmate. I cannot believe how much I love this man, and want to see him succeed in his ministry, his fatherhood and his life.

5. Serving at the Schools If you know me, I am not a leader type. But...I will help wherever there is a need. Man, there is a ton of needs going on at our schools right now. Rummage sales, Laps for Learning, Prayer groups, bake sales, and the list goes on. I know I am beyond privileged to stay home, so I want to do what I can to serve for those who can't.

6. Talking What a joy to have a family that is only a phone call away. My family and I have been in such close contact over the last few months due to lots of struggles many of us has had to face recently. We pray together, share life, encourage each other, and laugh. I wish we lived in the same town, but I love that when we do get together, it is intentional.

7. Exercising Well, actually that was keeping me away for about two weeks, but it has unfortunately not been happening in the last week or so. Why does working out have to be such work. Ugh, I'm not good at it AT ALL.

8. Reading I don't know why I've been on such a reading kick lately. I still don't do it as much as I'd like, but I do take time each day to indulge myself.

9. Acting and Helping My Man Hehe, nothing that you would probably ever see unless you go to Real Life Fellowship Church. Skip and I have done two funny video skits for our relationship series and I secretly LOVE IT! I could never stand on a stage and speak in front of people, but somehow talking on video doesn't bother me at all. I'll try to post the videos on here in case you aren't my facebook friend. Btw, if you aren't my Facebook friend, why not?

10. Working on Some Fruit Fruit, as in Fruit of the Spirit is a main goal of mine to work on this fall season. I want to especially hone in on self-control and patience. Oh boy, can I also get some help with love. I have a tendency to be way too judgmental and I'm plain sick of it. God is helping me already, but I have a long way to go. Learning to walk in the Spirit is what the Living Beyond Yourself bible study is teaching me. Confessing what needs to be confessed first thing in the morning is my struggle right now. Often there is so much that comes to mind, it is a lot to take in. I know it is going to get easier, but for now, I need lots of prayer time.

Okay, now you know where I've been. This blog has always been a personal journal, and I'm glad I took some time to write out why I'm not writing on it. Love that I'll probably look back in 5 or 10 years and laugh at what I said on October 7, 2009. It's good to laugh. Speaking of laughing, I hear the kids doing just that in the other room. Off to see what I missed.

Listening to His Voice

I want to let you guys in on a little secret about me. Many years ago I had said some things and acted in ways that were not okay according to the standards set before me at church. Even though I felt 100% wrongly accused of the situation, I had to stand up to a verbal reprimand. It wasn't physical of course, but it did some detrimental damage to my self worth. At the time the one thing I wanted more than anything was to mentor women, and in particular, lead up a group of ladies that would do the same. Part of my punishment, was being told that I would not be able to do this, and was not at a place in my walk to be trusted with such a thing.

It is funny to look back now and see how much of my self worth was wrapped up in the approval of others and believing that if someone else said I wasn't good enough to do something, it was so. I don't care if it is a friend, a family member or a pastor. I have learned that the very thing others try to take away from us, or tell us we can't do, is often the thing that we were created to do.

Shortly after my pity party years ago, I decided to start my own little bible study in my home with 12 ladies. It was my first bible study to lead at the time, but I knew if God placed this desire so strongly in my heart, that he would also equip me to do it. After that I continued with these same group of ladies for a few more studies until I moved away for a year of service in another church out of town. Going into a new church and only knowing a few ladies, I signed up to lead a few more studies. It blessed me so much, and the women I got to know always shared that it was also a blessing to them.

I have now been at our current church for almost a year and a half, and can you guess what I am doing? I have just started leading my 3rd Women's bible study here with an awesome group of women. Just last month I found out that one of the girls in my first study from several years ago is now leading a group of her own, and another lady from the church I just came from, started leading when I moved on. This my friends, is God working out good and bringing about His will and not man's. I don't regret having been reprimanded years ago, because now I am focused and know my purpose more clearly than I would have if it had come easily.

Is there something that you want to pursue? Is there a desire that has failed in the past, but you still long that it will come about in time? It doesn't have to be something big, maybe it is as small as leading a bible study. Maybe it is something big like changing careers. Give it to God, fully to God! Let Him have His way in you, and watch what only He can do.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

"What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies." Romans 8:31-33

Not Going To Let Martha Take The Lead

This morning I woke up early because I had to get to the school and get in line for the extra yearbooks that were for sale for those who forgot to purchase one ahead of time last year. I waited and waited, but the person in charge never showed up to sell them. One of my friends said that she saw the email and it was Friday and not Monday that they would be for sale. What??? I was absolutely sure I read the email right, but when I came home and checked it for myself, sure enough I was wrong. I was not only wrong about the date, but also the time. I've been wrong a lot lately. I've been attending lots of activities, signing up for many volunteer opportunities, yet I am not keeping track of everything I need to do. Basically I'm doing a lot of things mediocre and very few things excellent.

This morning was a reminder that I need to not rush into help everywhere I can, but wait for God's leading and do a FEW things well. It will only make me look foolish when I can't keep track of the simple things (like keeping track of a date and time). If you want to know a little secret about me is that when I have times like this where I completely am at a loss, I go to the expert for advice. Scripture. It never EVER lets me down.

I started by looking for scripture on wisdom, but I don't think that is the main source of me getting things jumbled. I think it is a lack of focus on what is important. I came across a very familiar scripture, but one I haven't been practicing since I began this new school year.

Luke 10:38-42 "Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”

Are you here with me? Does any of this make you stop and take notice? I need to be at Jesus' feet every morning before I even begin to fill in a sign-up sheet, before I even reply to an email, before I jump in with a yes to each and every volunteer opportunity under the sun. Serving my family, my school and my church are all very important, but nothing is more important than being with my Heavenly Father getting filled so that I can pour into others.

It's Here-Yay!

I am like a kid in a candy store when it comes to getting in new bible study curriculum. I love seeing a brand new workbook, full of empty pages. The reason I love it so much is that I know, through the 10 weeks of homework I will take on when doing a Beth Moore study, will be 10 weeks of the Lord teaching me something new about Him and his Word. It makes me tear up just thinking about it. There are so many studies I have done, that I can recall exactly what I was going through at the time just by remembering what study I did. I also love meeting new girls who are also have a passion for knowing our Savior more intimately. The excitement is always contagious too. Once you do a Beth study, you have to do another and another.

Bible studies get me going! So what gets you going and pumped about life and living? It doesn't have to be a spiritual thing either. I'm just curious as to what makes you feel like a kid in a candy store.

It Starts With a Plan

I am the kind of person if I don't have a plan or goal, I will pretty much run around aimlessly for quite some time and feel completely useless and unmotivated. That was pretty much my summer this year. It wasn't that it was a bad summer, I just didn't get much accomplished. Why? I had no plan.

Since school is back in session (Hallelujah praises!) I now have somewhat of a plan for myself. I'm still not quite in a routine, but I am moving forward in a couple of areas. For one, I am devoting the next several months to getting healthier. I am on day 11 of exercising (most days, not all) and eating about 75% fruit and veggies. It hasn't been great results, but the true observer (my husband Skip) can tell a difference. I have to remember that it took many years to put on the extra 35 lbs lingering on my hips and waistline, so it will probably take many months to remove them.

My second goal I am working on is letting go of things I cannot change. This is probably the hardest area for the middle child in me. I always want peace and I always want situations around me to work out. For some reason or another, I often find myself on the receiving line of people's problems. I take it as an honor that people confide in me, but when so many are hurting and wanting to share, I get very overwhelmed. When the problems turn into crisis, I really take it personal. I often think things like, "Am I really making a difference?" "Maybe I'm not qualified to counsel?" "If someone chooses to follow a different solution that God's Word, it is somehow a reflection of me." I know these are all lies that satan wants me to believe, but I tend to agree most of the time.

God really spoke to me at a recent Beth Moore simulcast when she said, "People are going to do what they want." That simple 8 word sentence stopped me in my tracks. I do not have control! Wow, how freeing is that! I'm not sure why I needed Beth Moore to tell me that, but it helped. I can pray for my family and friends, I can point them to scripture and the instructions God has for their struggles and issues, but ultimately "People are going to do what they want." I never want people to shy away from bringing me their burden hearts, but when they do, I must remember that 8 word sentence. Then I also must give it to God, and leave it at His feet.

I will have a true test of living out my 2nd goal as I begin leading Beth Moore's "Living Beyond Yourself" at our church this fall (actually in 3 weeks!). I decided to give up the comfy home setting of my living room and reach out to the women in my church. This will allow childcare for mom's of young children which I'm hoping will make the commitment to join the study. My prayer is that God will bring exactly the women who need this, and that all of us will find a connection through the study of the Fruits of the Spirit(the topic of study).

I know I have only shared 2 goals, but for me this is going to be huge to accomplish. What are your top goals for the fall? I'd love for you to share your heart so I can be praying for great things in your life too.

A Storm That Only God Can Calm

I've been thinking a lot about the word "storm" these past two weeks. Someone very close to me is going through an extremely difficult time right now, and a storm is the one word that keeps coming to my mind when I think about their situation. Just for kicks I looked up the definition for a storm this morning. It is amazing how much real weather storms and our personal storms can sound and feel alike. Here are just a few definitions that caught my eye: an atmospheric disturbance, a heavy shower of objects, such as bullets or missiles, a strong or violent outburst, as of emotion or excitement and a violent disturbance or upheaval. All of these could describe many peoples' personal storms, but the one that stopped me in my tracks and hit me hardest was "a violent, sudden attack on a fortified place."

The person I have been praying for is under one of the worst spiritual attacks I have ever seen. Their fortified place has not only being attacked, it is being destroyed with bullets and missiles from every human angle. Everyday it seems there is more conflict, more uncertainty and more to fight against. I hate this storm for my loved one and wish more than anything that they could find a quick fix, that God would grant a miracle and that the dangerous storm would blow over. So far that has not happened, and I, along with many others continue to cry out to God on their behalf.

Thankfully, one thing that God keeps reminding me throughout His precious Word is that storms DO NOT LAST FOREVER. He has also given me peace that even though we don't see God taking away the storm, he is working in it. For instance, this person has recommitted their life to Christ with a passion I have not witnessed in a very long time. Second, my loved one is surrounded by believers that are encouraging every step of their difficult battle and being the hands and feet of Jesus in helping with varied needs. And lastly, God has put all of us close to this person on high alert for our own fortified places. We are investing more in the important things like strengthening our own faith, improving our prayer lives, becoming more "others" centered and relying on Jesus to do what we are not able to do on our own.

Are you experiencing your own personal storm that doesn't seem to blow over or end? I have wonderful news for you. God has your storm covered and He will use it for good when you trust him with it fully. It may not end the way we would like and it may seem to others that He has let us down or forgotten us. He hasn't, and I believe when all is said and done with my loved one's storm, we will be praising God that He allowed it to take place.

I love Romans 8:38-39 and when I read it in The Message translation today, it gave me such a reassurance of God's love for all of us.

"So, what do you think? With God on our side like this, how can we lose? If God didn't hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn't gladly and freely do for us? And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God's chosen? Who would dare even to point a finger? The One who died for us—who was raised to life for us!—is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ's love for us? There is no way! Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture:

They kill us in cold blood because they hate you.
We're sitting ducks; they pick us off one by one.

None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us. I'm absolutely convinced that nothing—nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable—absolutely nothing can get between us and God's love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us."

Great Movie and Great Read

Last night my sister took me to the late showing of Julie and Julia starring Meryl Streep and Amy Adams. We both laughed so many times, and even shed a few tears. I thought it was brilliant, and I want to take my culinary man to see it too. It was a movie that had a lot of levels for me as a writer and yet, I let myself just go and enjoy. You'll see what I mean if you are also a fellow writer. Most of all the movie made me want to eat. Ha ha! I do plenty of that already, but it made me want to seek out more challenging recipes. I always leave the sauces and real cooking to my husband. It is just following steps, which I do in baking all the time. Regardless, go see it. I think you will love it.

Do you all know Anne Rice? Yes, the vampire lady. Well, I had heard that she had returned to her Catholic faith and was now writing for Christ. When I was at the library last week I decided to give Anne Rice's Christ the Lord: Out of Egypt a try. I LOVED IT! ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT! I know it is just fiction, but it was beautifully written about what Jesus may have been experiencing as a young boy realizing who he was and what was to come for his life. I can't wait to read the next one.

I have been reading a lot of historical fiction this summer, especially The Lineage of Faith Series by Francine Rivers. I can't seem to get enough of my favorite fiction writer. If you have not had a chance to pick up a few and dive in, you will not be disappointed. I am also about to start her Sons of Encouragement Series. Can't wait!

I miss hearing from so many of you out there, if you have a Facebook, please let me know as that is where I've been spending too much of my free time. Blessings all!

Where is Susie?

My oldest daughter informed me last night that it was almost exactly one month since my last post. I kind of shrugged it off and told her, "Wow, that long?" Actually I know exactly how long it has been, but every time I sit down to write lately, my words seem meaningless. Since many of you who happened upon this are bloggers, you probably can relate in some way. If someone is going to take the time to read a post, you don't want to waste their time in the process.

However for me, my blog writing was never meant to be about writing that would get noticed for content or excellence. It has always been about a personal journal for myself, my children and anyone who happens upon it, to see how God has works in one's life who is surrendered to Him. I struggle, I triumph, I even sometimes crawl through this journey, but I press on with all my heart to seek Christ every step of the way.

Today is about seeking out a good family physician for my husband and for myself. We are both in need of a good physical and lifestyle change. Today is trying to creatively figure out how to stay in our home we know we can't afford. That may mean me going back to work part-time or putting our home on the market. Today is about praising God for what I do have which is far more than I could ever deserve. Lastly, today is about remembering God has it ALL covered, and the wisdom and counsel I seek, is readily available when I humbly go before him in prayer.

*** FYI***Faith Imagined is having a giveaway contest! She will be giving away three Amazon e-mail gift certificates: 1st place is $50, 2nd place is $30 & 3rd place is $15! Stop by her site for details and to be encouraged by this lovely writer.

Our Trip to Hartwell, Georgia

This summer has been one of my best yet! Not only have we been blessed with being back in our home, we have also been blessed by getting to take a trip to Georgia. Skip is the Creative Arts Pastor of Real Life Fellowship which gave us the opportunity to head over to Hartwell Georgia this past week. RLF has a beautiful campus there and Skip and I were honored to see what a huge impact this church is making in the hearts and lives of that community. The people there are amazing! There were smiling faces and hugs all around. Skip led worship on Sunday with some very talented musicians and was able to watch what hard work this awesome group of people in Hartwell put forth. It was great to see that week after week God is all given glory and honor by what the people in Hartwell are accomplishing.

Here is the front of the church which is actually a historic home in downtown Hartwell. It was renovated and this site launched in January of 2008. They normally run over 200 people a weekend in a town of 5000 people. God is good!

Here is an inside shot of the auditorium where they have morning worship service. There are two large screens which show a pre-taped message each week of our Pastor Micah Davidson.

Thought this was a fun picture of their bookstore! The entire historic home is such a gorgeous place for a church. Lots of talented people put in hours and hours of time to make it so awesome.

Here is some of the congregation having fellowship time before service began. Lots of donuts and coffee were on hand. I went for the sweet tea every time we came on site. Love that Georgia sweet tea!

During our stay, we visited the Alpine Village of Helen, Georgia. What a precious place! We walked around and visited tons of little shops and enjoyed the beautiful scenery. You can see more about Helen here.

While in Georgia Skip and I stayed with a friend from the church Skip had met the year before. Adam was a great host and even showed us around the University of Georgia campus in Athens. Go Bulldogs! I think every room in Adam's beautiful home had something from his Alma mater. This picture of Skip and me was taken on the beautiful grounds of University. Skip even rang the Chapel Bell a couple of times. Thanks to Adam and his sweet girlfriend Laci for the tour and the fun visit.

Skip and I were able to spend the most time with our pastor's sweet parents who are the campus pastors of RLF Hartwell. Bill and Alice Davidson have more energy that most 20 year olds I know and have such a huge passion for the people of their community. They introduced us to just about everyone in town and lavished us with southern hospitality. Here is a just one picture of their beautiful yard. Alice is a master gardener and let me join her in picking tomatoes, blackberries, blueberries, squash and a few strawberries. She and her husband live on beautiful Lake Hartwell and the scenery literally took my breath away.

Here is Skip with Pastor Bill in front of Gumlog, a popular landmark restaurant in Georgia. They serve up a great basket of catfish, flounder and shrimp that Skip and I shared. Oh, and lots of sweet tea too!

Here is a shot of Lake Hartwell just an hour before the best fireworks show I've ever seen in my ENTIRE life started. The fireworks were about at the Disney level and it was literally right over our heads. Wow, what a show!

Even though Skip was there to do some ministry work, I truly felt like this was a great time of rest and refreshment. Can you tell with my feet up here? Thanks so much to all the people of Hartwell for blessing us with your love and encouragement. Thank you to Pastor Micah and Lori for giving us the opportunity to go and see firsthand what is God is doing, and lastly to my awesome in-laws who watched our kids for 5 days with no break. I love you both so much and don't know what I did to deserve such wonderful grandparents for my kids.

17 Years and Counting

It's 17 years today! Wow, it seems so crazy that 17 years ago Skip and I stood before God, family and friends and committed ourselves to love, honor and cherish each other forever. I remember with such clarity staring at Skip at the alter and thinking, "This man is perfect. I can't imagine life every being anything but absolutely magical with him." Boy, was I naive. He probably thought the same thoughts about me too. Only he probably thought something like, "This woman is so hot. She is going to be the wife of my dreams and always look amazing and want me 24/7." Cmon, he is a guy and these are important things in their manly world.

What we actually experienced in our 17 years was such a roller coaster ride of abrupt stops, huge curves out of nowhere, and a ride we often wanted to stop and get off. People often look to us as the couple "so in love" or the couple who seems to know what it takes to succeed. Oh I wish we had it all figured out so I could share this a make a million. I truly don't believe there are any ideal steps to follow or rules that make a marriage work. For us it simply comes down to this, we fail...we fail a lot. We say things we shouldn't, we let one another down at times, and we often choose not to love and respect each other the way we should. However, we have a foundation that started about 6 months into our marriage that made all the difference in the world.

For those who know me, you know what that treasure is-it is Christ! Sure we might have made it without that foundation, in fact people have marriages all the time survive without putting God first. I'm definitely not saying it can't happen. But there is freedom in Christ that I know takes our marriage to the next level. Christ is the source that fills me, that never lets me down and gives me the desires of my heart. I can't expect a man to do what only God can do. There have been so many times that I wanted to make Skip my all, but he failed. Same with me, I can't love perfectly and meet all of Skip's needs. Christ lets both of us off the hook. Don't get me wrong here, Skip is the man of my dreams in so many ways as a great father, an amazing lover (insert ewww if my kids were reading) a fantastic provider and an honorable godly man, but he is simply, just a man. Oops, almost forgot a fantastic cook! Even with all these great points, I know that God loves me even more.

Today I want to thank God for my marriage and let Skip know how blessed I am to have him in my life. However, I also want to tell you that if you aren't feeling such wonderful adoration for your man, in fact you aren't even sure why you married the guy in the first place, then I want to give you a little wisdom that helps me on those days (yes, we all have those days.) Pray for him. Respect him. Hug him. Encourage him. Serve him. Love him. Even if you don't feel like it or he doesn't deserve it, do it today. Above all else, ask God to make your marriage one of honor. I'm still doing that today after 17 years and I can honestly say "God answered!"